Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Prince Charming and Cinderella Syndrome

I'm getting really sick of the fairy tales we tell our little girls and boys about how there is someone that is perfect for you, and you just need to wait, and your prince will come, and the happily ever after that will ensue when you find your princess.

This is so damaging for both genders, what big shoes for Cinderella's heart to fill, and what impossible standards for The Prince to live up to.   It's not fair to fill their ready to absorb minds, with tales that set them up for self defeat in love.  They can not live up to the promise of this story, and it's not true.  There is no happy ending, and it's just as great a lie to say you have to 'want it to work'  you have to 'work at it'.

You don't have to work at it, if you follow your heart and just love who you are meant to love.  It isn't hard at all.  In fact it's only hard when you force it, or choose.  I think it's a mistake to say that a choice in love was 'bad or a bad fit' or 'that you couldn't choose the love of your life because the timing was wrong', or 'that you need to make this work'.  As soon as a choice exists it can only be bad.  LOVE is NOT about CHOICE.  

Love is messy.  Love never happens at the 'right time', and Love usually rips your world apart taking your sanity with it.  Love starts in an instant and lasts for eternity.  It has many levels, and can open many doors ones we never thought would open again and ones we didn't even know were there.

Love is more than a reflection of your soul in someone else's eyes, it is a recognition of equality, respect, and desire all rolled up into a package that seem too good to be true.  And while you push it away believing that you can't possibly be this lucky or this happy, that, that can't be real, it can't be that easy, because you have to WORK AT IT.  You are giving up the the love you are suppose to be living.  You are choosing something that is proscribed by your mind to be what you should choose, because by working at it, it will last.

Can you see me shaking my head at you?  So wrong.. . How stressful. . .  How sad that we think everything has to be hard, when Love is the easiest thing in the world, because it just is.

Love is not a choice.

Love is what you feel.

When you are at peace, calm, passive. . . (Yoda was right)

It starts with the self and radiates outward to everyone you care about.  Don't push away any love that you are lucky enough to find, for that is bad karma, and that will come back on you tenfold.  Love is not forgiving when denied.  And Fate, the cold bitch, will continue to put in front of you choices until you make the right one.  Until you choose to trust your feelings, and just love, even if it's messy, even if it comes at the wrong time.  Until you let love choose you, your choices will fail.  That is her specialty.  That's the real test.  Are you willing to give up everything you think is important to gain what truly is?  I will not make the wrong choice again in love for I will not chose love.  It has chosen me, and there is nothing I can do about it, but feel.


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