Sunday, June 20, 2010

Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway

For those of you that read me weekly you know I never do reviews....well, never say never. While this recent new unemployment (week number 2)and heartbreak at not getting the man of my dreams (month number 2)I've been feeling very down on myself, cynical, unwanted and unloved, unworthy. Feelings I know all of you have felt at one point in your life.

One of my truest and best friends suggested a book that really helped him during a bout of similar depression, years ago. In fact he says he will often pull it out and re-read certain passages to remind himself how he should be feeling about whatever it is that has gotten him upset.

This intrigued me. Both being intellectuals and you know how they are, they never really need any help, or never admit it, or only suggest things in hushed tones.

Well I took this suggestion to heart and ran to my local library to get a copy. I read it in one sitting that same afternoon and evening. It was that good. And it had reminded me of how I use to be. I how I use to live my life just knowing that everything, somehow was going to be alright. The power of positive thinking is really what I had forgotten.

That and a very simple rule: The subconscious mind does not know the difference, like the conscious mind. So that means that you can tell yourself, every day, "I am worthy, I am strong, I am creating the perfect (insert issue here---job, relationship, body) NOW." and your subconscious mind will believe it. Hook, line, and sinker. See, you don't even have to believe it, youself. And that is how you get your Higher Self to grow and become more in charge than your Chatterbox.

Susan Jefferes, Ph.D. wrote this amazing little book and she goes into great detail about how we all listen to that Chatterbox in our head first. The one that tells us we can't do it, I'm not worthy, I shouldn't do it, I hope, If only....if any of this sounds familiar, you are not taking responsibility for your life.

I have several quotes that I love from the book, and when you read it you will too, but for me, the one that really hits home is: "You’re not a failure if you don’t make it; You’re a success because you try"

That formula alone will stop you from not taking the risks that will make you happy. That's right, RISKS make you HAPPY. Not being right or living the safer route. There is no right or wrong decision, just learning experiences. Life is learning, and if you live your life afraid of risks, because you think they aren't right (and I'm not talking illegal stuff here) then you aren't truly happy.

As I was reading the book I had a breakthrough....."When had I stopped living my life like this?" I remember distinctly after the divorce, when my best friend Erin helped me "shed" and find my voice again. (thank you my dearest!) But where had i lost it? And it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had taken a risk (a good thing!) and tried a job that my heart was just not black enough to do....being a landlord. And to do the job over a period of almost 2 years I had to "Be" a certain way with the tenants that I didn't like. And it started to turn me into a cynical, bitter person. I'm not sorry for the experience, quite the contrary, I'm thankful that learned I'm not cut out for that, even if without it, I'm unemployed and struggling. I know the universe is creating the perfect job for me RIGHT NOW. I know I'll get another job. (not i hope, not I'm trying, not I'm looking......I KNOW)

I, like the author don't know how this works, but it does. The more positive energy you put out into the universe, the more comes back to you. I suggest this book for anyone who can read. Hell, if you can't read have someone read it to you! It has helped me to become more relaxed and focused after just two days of practicing her methods. Some may call it brainwashing, or pop-psych. I don't care. If it works then it's good.

So if you are having the same problems I was having, and I know my Chatterbox is not gone, but it's sure much more quite, I suggest you read this book. I promise you it will help. And if you are a positive person, like I AM right now (see how much i learned?) It never hurts to have a refresher course.Search for feel the fear and do it anyway by susan jeffers


  1. Great post! I love this book too. Thank you for personalizing it so well. You have grown so much since HS...LOL

  2. I just had a feeling the book would strike the same chords with you that it did for me. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Now I need to go thumb through it again...